L.O.V.E. Yourself

I don't know what happened. I'm not sure what turned things around for me during my 30 day hot yoga challenge. Last week I was going into my hot yoga classes and ending up frustrated and unable to focus. This week, I'm leaving the ego behind and doing my best at staying in the moment. I think I'm just starting to understand a little more of what yoga is all about. The messages from each instructor are starting to sink in ever so slowly. One message that stood out for me this week ... Love Yourself. So simple yet for some it's a difficult task. As the instructor read a passage about loving yourself, I took it all in. I was smiling a little bit ... knowing that I was loving myself. (I do admit that some days I don't like me). It's so true what they say ... only when you love yourself can you truly love others. And when you love yourself, you attract love. Well, I received love before I even left the yoga studio that day. A woman took the time to tell me that she loved watching me on TV. How nice! Then another woman also with the same message a short time later. In fact, we talked for about 20 minutes after class about fitness, working out, yoga, organic food, clean eating and more. I was feeling the love. Then I started to think back to all the loving moments in these past couple of weeks. A get together with some awesome girlfriends. Downtime with my sweetie. Thanksgiving dinner with his family. And I can't forget all the girlfriends who joined me in a hot yoga class since I started my 30 day challenge. And I'm sure if I took the time, I could come up with more. So you see how making the decision to love yourself UNCONDITIONALLY can open your eyes to all the love that's flowing (or trying to flow) into your life? When you've made that decision take a few moments ... even if it's just 10 minutes ... and think of all the L.O.V.E. in your life.

No Sugar Coating ... Keeping it Real

30 Day Hot Yoga Challenge ... Day 4 Observations

*I wanted to make friendly eye contact ... a connection ... with someone before class. Shouldn't everyone be smiling at a yoga studio? I feel like the new girl in school.

*I was obsessed with how my body looked in the mirror. Hips looked wide. Wish my core was tighter. The "girls" are sagging way too much.

*I'm frustrated ... the instructor is going too fast. No where near ready for these intermediate or advanced moves. Am I doing this right?

*I should have eaten more and had more water today. Dizzy.

*Emotions? ... a mixture of sad and mad at the end of class. Neither emotion was really strong. Just a sprinkle of both.

Yes I realize these are mostly negative ... That's just how it was today. No sugar coating. Keeping it real.

Vinyasa Flow? Vinyasa ... Whoa!

Andrea warned me. She's one of many inspirational women I trust and admire for her honesty, spirit, and her brains. In fact it was about 3 years ago that she suggested I take a month off of everything. Real rest. Back then I lasted a week. Now I'm supposed to be resting because of my foot mainly ... and because I'm a bit burnt out ... and instead I decided to do a 30-day yoga challenge. Yes I realize that's not resting. Restorative yoga was my original goal but I couldn't always make it to those classes. Anyway, I told Andrea yesterday that I was doing this hot yoga challenge while "resting". This is exactly what she said "Rest my ass! Hot yoga will kick your ass!" That it did today. Vinyasa flow turned into Vinyasa ... whoa! This is how they describe it at the studio: "The practice is a combination of different traditions of yoga that come together for a dynamic mix of sweat and spirit. It will tone your body and electrify your mind." I couldn't have said it better myself. It was a tough class ... but at the beginning the instructor told us to set our intention for the class. My intention was to do my best to finish the class and do the postures to the best of my ability. She also told us to leave our egos outside ... I couldn't help but smile. That word has been haunting me for the last few weeks. Probably because I've got some work to do on scaling back my own ego.. And today's kick-ass class was a great reminder. Namaste.

Unexpected Emotions

Apparently hot yoga isn't "resting" but I'm doing it anyway. Someone suggested I do some yoga while I'm taking a break from teaching fitness classes. Since I like hot yoga I went to a nearby hot yoga studio. It just so happens that it was the first day of the studio's 30-day challenge. Did someone say "challenge"? Okay! It didn't take long to convince me to do it. After all, I may be out of the teaching game for over 3 weeks.

What a shocker in my second hot yoga class. I experienced some unexpected emotions. I was in a restorative yoga class. This class is for those recovering from injuries or illness as well as those looking to relax and unwind. Yep. Sounds like a perfect class for me right now. After a little guided mediation the instructor asked a select few what they wanted to work on. I was hoping she would ask me and she did! I suggested hips ... a sore and tight spot for me. So here we went into a pose to open up the hips. Starting with the right side, I noticed it was very tight and uncomfortable as I went into the stretch. Nothing new. *Breathe!* But as the instructor started to explain a little about the hips, all she had to say was " ... this is where we carry a lot of our emotions ... " and I had this urge to cry. What the ...? What's going on? I focused on my breath ... trying to hold back the tears ... but at the same time trying to let them flow. I was on the verge of sobbing. I've heard that this can happen to those who practice yoga ... but I never, ever thought it would happen to me. What an experience to have on day 2. It may never happen again or it may happen several more times! Needless to say, this 30 day hot yoga challenge will be an interesting journey.

Very Bad Timing ... Or is it?

So I'm out for at least three weeks. I can't teach my beloved Get Ripped classes. Why? Because of an injury. Not my hamstring, or shoulder, or knee. I have an overuse injury on my big toe on my left foot. Can you believe it? Who injures their big toe? So basically no impact exercises on my feet for a while ... which is pretty much a lot of what I do when I teach. What upsets me is I worked my way up the Get Ripped ladder and now I'm teaching four regular classes plus a boot camp. I had my Mondays and Fridays at Fitness Plus South and my Thursdays and Saturdays at Talisman Centre. I was a few weeks into that routine and an old injury popped up. An injury I was trying to "play through". An injury I should have dealt with a long time ago. So it basically didn't go away ... I just ignored it ... and it got worse. (Hello ego!) Very bad timing ... or is it?

After I left the physiotherapy office ... wrapping my head around the diagnosis ... I quickly sent an email to my Get Ripped boss Jari explaining everything so they can start to fill my classes with other instructors. I felt bad. I felt sad. All I was thinking was ... "All the participants are going to forget about me." Silly ... I know. But as I started to relax and slowly accept my situation I actually felt a little relief. Yes that's right ... relief. You see, I was starting to get burnt out. Fatigued. Almost falling asleep at the wheel a couple times in the middle of the day was a big wake up call for me (no pun intended). Unfortunately my ego gets the best of me and I felt I could do it all. Wrong. I'm tired. And I need to rest.

I've been going non-stop for about a year now. It started with practicing for the Get Ripped DVDs and my group fitness certification, plus training for my figure competition. That spilled right into more classes in the spring and even more in the summer. Then sprinkle in a few fitness and nutrition courses. And that's all on top of a work schedule that wreaks havoc on my energy levels. It's all AMAZING stuff! (except waking up at 3:00AM ... not so amazing). I loved it all! It was my decision to do all of those things ... but what I should have as well was scheduled in some good, solid rest time ... rest for my body, mind, and spirit. Well, it looks like my "toe" did the scheduling for me. So let me move my mega ego aside ... *ugh* ... and do what I have to do to rest, heal ... and come back stronger!

Falling in L.O.V.E. ... Again!

If you think I'm going to spill the beans about my love life ... You're right! But wait! I'm talking about my first and only true love ... I'm falling in L.O.V.E. with ME!

I never stopped loving ME. But to be honest, I was having a difficult time liking ME. Well the physical ME I'd see in the mirror every day. You see, it's been well over 3 months since I competed in my 7th figure competition. And it's only been about a month since I started loving how my body looks. That's the thing about physique competitions. My body doesn't stay that lean, ripped and stage-ready all the time. Post-comp I don't do nearly as much cardio, I have "dirty" food whenever, and if I want to skip a day in the gym ... I do it.

However, after 5 years of being in this lifestyle, each year I've adopted more and more healthy habits in my EVERY DAY life. And it has paid off. I may have my curves back but they're sexy, not sloppy. I may not always have a "leg day" or "back day" every week but I'm active at least 4 days a week. I may not pound out a solid 60 minutes of cardio daily but I'm teaching several fitness classes a week ... working up a sweat with my class participants. And sometimes as I'm calling out the next move, I catch a glimpse in the mirror and there's still some definition in my arms and shoulders. There's still some strength in my legs as I put my class through dozens and dozens of squats.

But what's best of all, after every workout, I feel good. And isn't that what it's all about? L.O.V.E.!

I've Come a Long Way

It was the winter of 2006 when I started to train for my very first physique competition. It was the fitness model category. Hahaha! Wow! I've come a long way since then. After that first show I did 6 more in the figure category. Some were not great experiences. Most were pretty awesome! Through it all, I developed my passion for all things fitness and health. I wanted more of it. I wanted to challenge myself to see how much farther I could go. I wanted to hang out with people who lived the fitness lifestyle. I wanted to live that uber healthy lifestyle too. I wanted to share with everybody how good it feels being fit! So I got certified as a group fitness instructor. I started out doing the odd class here and there. Now I'm a regular at "the largest multi-sport complex of its kind in Canada"... the Talisman Centre in Calgary. It's an awesome way to motivate a large group of people and have fun at the same time!



So why stop there ... right? Right! I've mentioned this in a previous blog entry ... I'm actually going to take a personal training course. In fact, it starts next week. I was on the fence about actually getting certified as a personal trainer. I had all kinds of excuses. "Everybody's a personal trainer." "I'm too old." "I've got way too much to learn." "There's no way I could make a decent living." Then I recognized those excuses for what they really are .... FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real.

I'm inundated with positive quotes and messages from Twitter and Facebook friends about living my best life and following my passion ... and that the only thing holding me back is myself. So I'm doing my best to get out of my way and I'm going for it!



So even though if feels like my journey has just begun, I know I've come a long way and I'm stoked about the journey ahead!